Supporting Youth at Recognizing Safe Peer Interactions and Relationships
- Sarah Khan & Abbie Cameron
- Feb 10
- 4 min read
Developing peer relationships as a child plays a vital role in psychological and social development. It allows them to develop important skills and an understanding of social norms. However, sometimes it can be difficult to identify safe relationships as a child. As parents and caregivers, you want to ensure your child practices safe and healthy relationships amongst their peers. Whether it be in school, on the playground, or in your neighbourhood, building a strong foundation on decision-making as well as an understanding of healthy relationships can go a long way.
As a parent or guardian, you can offer guidance without overstepping boundaries through encouraging open discussion and talking about setting safety rules. As your children grow, they tend to meet more peers and develop relationships that can influence them both positively and/or negatively. Relationships, both friendly or romantic, should be built on trust, respect, loyalty, and kindness. Let's go through some ways that you can help your child build healthy and safe relationships.
Allow them to name/identify emotions
Teach them to pay close attention to others and their feelings (encourage them to put themselves in another person's shoes)
Practice effective communication skills
Teach them how to cooperate with others
Validate their feelings and allow them to identify and reflect on why they feel that way
Help them find the root of the issue (what caused the conflict to occur?)
Allow them to come up with their own ideas/solutions by reflecting on the entire situation
Help them communicate their feelings about the conflict without putting shame or blame on the other person (use "I" statements, e.g. "I feel sad because you said...")
Practice role-playing the situation (act out the conversation with your child to build confidence)
Here are some ways your child can develop boundaries and avoid being pressured into doing things that make them feel uncomfortable.
Encourage your child to say no ("No thanks, I don't want to")
Encourage asking questions ("Why is it so important to you that I do that?")
Encourage putting a stop to convincing ("That sounds like a good time, but no thanks")
Encourage them to step away from the situation when necessary ("Sorry, I have to leave" and then walk away)
For neurodivergent children with conditions such as autism or ADHD, they may have limited communication, social, and motor skills. This can hinder their ability to positively interact with their peers and develop safe friendships with their peers. However, by implementing certain strategies, you can help your child have safe and respectful relationships.
Use role-play or social stories with written scripts or drawings to help your child understand how to communicate with peers (i.e. take turns with a toy)
Help your child get involved in playgroups, extracurricular activities or clubs at school to find peers with similar interests
Teach your child to recognize sensory overload and how to self-regulate when interacting with friends
For neurodivergent teens, they might desire to seek out a romantic relationship but have difficulty identifying when boundaries are overstepped or when they are put in an unsafe situation. Here are some ways you can help them identify a safe and fulfilling relationship.
Look for a partner who demonstrates patience, kindness, willingness to adapt and understands personal space
Communicate your needs directly and celebrate shared interests
Utilize tools or routines to manage commitments and respect routines (i.e. planner)
Be aware of controlling behaviour or pressure to mask neurodivergence
Do not overlook your own needs to please others
Be aware of individuals who might rush intimacy
Parents and caregivers should also be aware of some signs of their child being in an unsafe relationship. Looking for these signs, as well as encouraging your child to share their concerns, can really ensure that the appropriate action is taken.
Feeling anxious, nervous, depressed or have low self-esteem
Being told what to do or wear
Being put down or criticized
Experience threats or violence
Verbal abuse (name-calling or saying inappropriate things)
Physical abuse (hitting, pushing)
Emotional abuse (undermining or excluding a child from a friend group)
Cyberbullying (sending threatening, abusive or embarrassing messages)
Navigating peer interactions and relationships can be difficult. However, with the right support, open communication, and firm understanding of boundaries, kids feel more confident and equipped to develop and maintain healthy friendships and relationships. Additionally, these important skills will carry them throughout their development as they reach milestones and meet new people.
Additional Resources: Helping Kids Navigate Healthy Relationships: Tip Sheet for Parents
Check out our related blogs on safety:
At WonderTree, we help children build the social, emotional, and communication skills they need to form safe and healthy relationships. Through individualized, play-based support and guided social learning, we empower children to understand emotions, set boundaries, and navigate peer interactions with confidence. We also support parents and caregivers with practical strategies to reinforce these skills at home and in the community.
#WonderTree #HealthyRelationships #ChildDevelopment #SocialSkills #EmotionalLearning #Neurodiversity #InclusiveSupport #ParentingSupport #PositiveFriendships #ChildWellbeing #SocialDevelopment #FamilySupport #SafeConnections #GrowingTogether
IMPORTANT: Information shared by WonderTree is not intended to replace or be constituted as clinical or medical care. It’s intended for educational purposes only. Each child is unique, and the information provided may not be applicable to your specific situation. If you need support, please establish care with a licensed provider so that they can provide tailored recommendations for you or your child. This blog is non-monetized.
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